SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

well..b4 i cont..jus update on the monday matter..well..the MO said..NOTHING! didnt giv me any excuss letter or wat from it..

i still hav to do PT (walking), marching!

the pain leads to my back and knee..well i checked wif the Specialize liao..already confirmed there is no hope in that letter..

they said the same thing..even to 1 guy who kana worst den me..he got gone thro' operation and his leg got metal in it..to support

"How low you wanna go? Your Pes is already considered as the lowest!" Your this kind of condition can go upgrade!" in a fierce tone..

my fren is like..wat de heck la..even his condition oso kana this sayin..i reali hav nth to sae la..me already like tis..cant tahan already like tt..he worst..oso like tt..wat to sae..haiz..

well..veri sad la..i hav to endure this stupid pain for the next 5 wks!

argh..i duno how can i tahan..this pain had got worst ever since i enter NS la..had nv stop pain..last time at least will stop..now not even one day i am pain-free!

argh..i am super pissed..

i confirmed today..wif my Family Doctor wat is the real condition to my pain:

1: My Catalius (duno how to spell) is not enough, not tight, lax..at the knee and back area especially..
2: Flat Foot (i didnt even noe this la 0,0, even my parent)
3: the knee is not str8, it got a bit bend.

wif this 3 reason, that is the main cause of my pain and cos of condition 1 especially, that make the support at each join too soft..and hence, there isnt much support and i will easily get the pain especially this period..from morning 4am till nite 9-10pm den i can get my rest..is like argh!

pain la..u go count how mani hour is that..now u noe how much i suffer in camp!

i endure the pain thro these period..argh argh argh..sometime i reali duno why am i born in this country..how i wish can jus b a ger and skip thro this period of time la! this is the worst time of my whole entire life!

we (the whole platoon) even kana scolded by a Sir (not our platoon one la, but company) till like are an useless piece of JUNK! yes..Pes C is like crab! nothing in his eyes..and all the vulgur..argh..

i cant tahan..1st day we learnt that vulgur is against the law..and can kana extra or DB but this is like..wat de heck la..

well..i duno how can i survive the next 5 long wk for me..somemore this wk is my most sian-est wk ever in my whole entire life!

i almost hav no wkn! yes..i repeat it..i almost hav no wkn..no..is not cos i did something bad..but it is a normal process..a routine..a must for ever one who serve NS during BMT to go thro..something call Guard Duty..and yes..thats me..i kana..and yes..i lost my SAT!

book out today at normal time (5+pm) then book in tmr (7+am) and book out on sunday (8am) then book in on the same day (sunday) at 7pm!

its like wat de heck..like this whole wk..from monday to sunday..i had nv leave the campsite like tt la..argh..wkn is like there but i not enjoying it..somemore guard duty is like 24hr! how can i tahan la..the wk is long..and how am i going to survive the wkdays coming! wk 3..argh..i dun how i can tahan my life like tis..

Do pray that i wun kana Guard Duty man..i asked ard..and some yfers (who had been thro this period said) they onli serve 1 time in their whole BMT life..jus 1 time Guard Duty..plus theirs is on wkdays one! argh..no wkn eaten up!

somemore they still sae our wkn veri precious! argh..wat de heck la..i am so pissed..this whole wk..my mood GONE!

i am super sad..i wanna cry la..my wkn GONE..i cant go TM..i cant REST (most impt)

i duno how the next wk i going to survive! i am super upset! depress! angry! tired!

argh..why this hav to happen to me! why am i born in Singapore! why am i a Guy! argh..why must we hav such law that all guys must go army! why!

if i am healthy i dun mind..but come on..i cant tahan the wk la..my stupid leg and back pain..is super painful la..i duno how i am going to survive the next wk to come and another few wks more to my POP (passing out parade)

plus we hav to take some test..and i oso scare i will fail..plus i heard that in the past history, no one ever failed it..that make me even more worried!

i am so scare..i reali duno wat to do..i dunwanna extend my stay here! it is so stupid la..i am so depress..worried too..i dun wan cos i fail the stupid test and extend my stay here! i wan to leave on 24th August or earlier (depend on my Commander)!

i reali super sad..this whole 7 wks wun transform me at all..i can confirm wif u all..it jus make me even more dun like the life la..argh..i duno how i can survive!

T_T

i seriously duno how..argh..

i now that the Lord is by my side and i should pray..i had been praying daily..morning and nite..for the ease at the pain on my knee and back..day by day..my knee and back got more and more painful..then wat..at wk 7, i cant move?

i seriously duno how i going to survive the next 5 long stupid wk!

once my Birthday come..mean is the last 5 days (or less) to my POP day (i hope, if i pass the test which i duno i can pass or not)

i reali pray the test wun be as difficult as i fear..my parents sae dun worrie..but in my mind i duno why..i keep worryin abt the test..

and best the test..i worried abt my pains during the wk..

and not onli that..can i POP or not! argh..

i reali hope everythin will be smooth for me la..i wanna get out from this worst place of my entire life ever!

i can sae i miss school life..i wish to return and stick to it! no work..jus study all the way..

argh..

i am super sad..my wkn got eaten up like tis la..no wkn for me!

next sat..is CG outing and hence..i wun be able to meet any YFers! argh..again one sat gone jus like tt..how how how!

how can i survive such thing..

i duno..

i am all alone..argh..

well..but beside these bad stuff..i oso wanna thanks the Lord for some stuff too..

well..my platoon got 2 Bunk, A and B..

mine is in A and i Praise the Lord that my bunkmates are veri co-operative and frenly too..and oso PTL that i am in this bunk and able to make frenz wif almost 90% of them la..or maybe lesser abit but better den 0% rite?

well..at the beginning is 0% but now is not..

and thanks the Lord i am not place in Bunk B..cos alot of problem from there..fights..vulgurs..and out of 20 ppl..onli 6 (the guai-er ones) are doing their area cleaning onli..de rest? onli noe how to fight..slack..slp..tok..sit ard..tok vulgur..smoke..

well..and some of them kana extra..and 1 nearly kana DB..

well..i dun reali mix wif any1 from that Bunk B la..most of the time 99% or even can sae 100% is wif my Bunk A ppl..

they are more frenly..and more team bonding..

if i am place in the other one..i can 1 thing..i will SUFFER!

but PTL..i am not onli place in this bunk wif better bunkmates and frenlier..and able to to make fren..cos i was afraid i will havin no fren..but PTL i am not..

cos like u all read in previous post too..i got problem wif water drinking..but now..no more =)

yeah..

well..thats the onli change i had from it..other den that..other changes..got got..but not good..but bad..yes u seen it and read it..

my PAIN!

yes

thanks army for making my PAIN WORST! argh..

oh btw..regarding the dun like guy part..is jus tis period..as in..due to like ger no need go army..but of course i noe being guy got its good point too..jus i felt veri sian being a guy hav to go thro this kind of stuff..

thanks ar..thanks..

TO BE CONTINUE . . .