The navinetwork Crush & Love Series Article:
Singled Out
Adapted from Nicole Doyley

Singlehood.

For some people, it's a walk in the park. They relish the freedom of not being tired down by another person, and having the time and space to pursue personal passions, like picking up a new language, learning how to pole-dance, or going for rock-climbing lessons. They see it as an opportunity to explore who they really are, and who they can be.

On the flip side of the coin, some singles feel like they got the short end of the stick. They find themselves constantly envying others, and feeling incomplete in a group of lovey-dovey, starry-eyed couples. Things get even worse when they see the class nerd going out with a hot babe or hunk. They find themselves constantly asking "What's wrong with me?"

All of us are designed for relationships with others; we need to give and receive affection, and to connect with people. That's why being single can sometimes feel like we're missing out on something that the rest of the world is enjoying - we long for that level of authentic conncetion and intimacy with a significant other, to be known and appreciated for who we truly are.

Whether you are a happy swinging single, or a depressed left-on-the-shelf-er, you're entitled to feel waht you feel. But for what's it worth, here's our remedy for chasing the blues away.

Believe that you have a destiny greater than marriage.
A lot of singles send life as though they are in a perpetual waiting room, just waiting for their turn to walk down the aisle. But life is so much more than marraige. Don't just wait.

Figure out what your purpose in life is.
Whether you eventually get married or not, your life-role will not be limited to just a husband or a wife. Find out what you were created for, and move forward with a sense of purpose. Life doesn't start when you're married - it starts now!

Build friendships.
You friends are not 'second-best', or just a stand-in until Mr. or Ms. Perfect comes along, so don't treat them that way. Besides, you'll never know if one of them turns out to be right for your further down the road.

And above all, don't lose hope.

"I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out - plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for." Jeremiah 29 : 11

Here are some books to be introed to you all. You can borrow it from the TM412's Library or you can purchase it at bookstores =)

I KISSED DATING GOODBYE
A New Attitude Towards Relationships and Romance

Joshua Harris's first book, written when he was only 21, turned the Christian singles scene upside down...and people are still talking. I Kissed Dating Goodbye shows what it means to entrust your love life to God. Joshua Harris shares his story of giving up dating and discovering that God has something even better - a life of sincere love, true purity, and purposeful singleness. Honest and practical, it challenges cultural assumptions about relationships and provides solid, biblical alternatives to socierty's norm.

BOY MEETS GIRL
Say Hellow To Courtship

In Boy Meets Girl, Joshua Harris makes the case for courtship. As old-fashioned as it might sound, courtship is what modern day relationships desperately need. Think of it as romance chaperoned by wisdom, cared for by communtiy, and directed by God's Word. Filled with inspiring stories from men and women who have rediscovered courtship, Boy Meets Girl is honest, romantic, and refreshingly biblical. Include Courtship Conversations: eight ideas fro great dates that will help grow and guide your relationship.

Note: Joshua Harris is a bestselling author and the senior pastor of Covenant Life Church at Gaithersburg, Maryland. He speaks nationally and has led the New Attitude conferences for college students for six years. He and his wife, Shannon, have two children, Emma Grace and Joshua Quinn.

TO BE CONTINUED . . .